LADIES CORNER: Are you dating a man or a boy?

Always interesting and not always something as female's we think about. Is there really such a difference between the two? I know there are times when we date someone, all we really think about is " Do they like me, are they giving me enough attention?
You wont always see the real flaws behind the relationships or the real issues behind your own self worth and your own boundaries too, boundaries being the main word here.

So I would like to share with you, the real difference between the men and the boys. Now it is not obvious but it is more about what they do against what the say (that is where they get you!)
Let's have a look at these boys, so the first obvious sign you are datinga boy or shall we say, someone immature, would be that they are only thinking about hooking up with you…in other words investing their time for a quick catch up, a quick coffee, a quick one hour to see you when they are free, last minute cancellations or last minute text messages are all the signs you are dating someone who is not quite into the relationship as you would like. The other times they are investing mostly with their family, (still married) friends, or work. You are just part time to them.

Boys avoid those conversations related to emotions, or your needs or the future. You have not met their family, not been to their home, seen their friends, everything seems a little vague on the outside! Only for them to keep on telling you that they want to keep on seeing you. A mature man, or someone who wants to commit will have the mature conversation with you and be quite happy to let family members know about you to actually meeting them eventually.

.Complimenting can either go one way or another. Boys will just compliment to get one thing, men pay compliments to make you feel good. There is a difference in how it is delivered, men are givers, boys are takers, if you let them.

Boys are not necessarily living for the future, they live by the day, men work hard for the future, for themselves, their family and their lives with their chosen woman.

When just focusing on yourself its is all about you, party time and you can be lazy whenever you feel like it. When people need you, these men will love to help as much as they can to do whatever they can to help you.

If you are female who has her act together, a boy will feel slightly intimidated, men love these types of women. If he is insecure, about his own intellect he may try and compare, compete, boast, always talk about himself, his accomplishments and his needs, he wont risk that with someone who is intelligent and could possibly (in his mind) see through his flaws. That boy wont take any risks, whereas men do. They like a challenge, they like to ask questions about you, find out what you like and what makes you tick.

It is always interesting to hear about men versus boys when rejection kicks in, they don't like their pride being hurt, whether it is a man or a boy, both hate being rejected. The huge difference is a man will take those rejections as a positive change, the boy will act defensive and throw his toys out the pram. The man will feel you are worth it and make those huge changes to sacrifice his life for you. He will do anything for you.

Boys don't keep or stick to their words, men say it and mean it with words and actions. A man wont make it up, because he knows he cant live up to a lie and real men don't lie. A boy will however and he will just tell you what you want to hear to keep you happy and to get his needs met.

Now this is my biggest hate, boys will put you down, their ego's need to be inflated. If they feel threatened by you or incredibly insecure about anything around you, that is when they go in for the attack. Scared little boys, will be very defensive, angry, and will try and twist it back round without making any effort to try and be nice. Only for the apologies to set in at a later stage. It is their defence mechanism that keeps being set in.

A man makes you a priority a boy does not set any, he says one thing, clearly means something else or wants something else. A mature man wants to spend his time with you with the people he cares about and he is dating you, he means business and will only want to spend good quality time with you, he will want to be with you and you only.

So, who are you wasting your time on or what type do you prefer - a man or a boy?